DAYLIGHT STARS ^_***

Some people just love watching stars at night when the sky is wearing its dark blue shinning robe.

Other people, like me, are specialists in seeing stars in broad light during day time when anything strikes you on the face, hits your head, crashes your toes or bumps your hips thanks to insignificants objects like open doors, pieces of furniture or even traffic signs on the street to make it short.

My daylight stars list can be really long so I am not going to put it black on white but you have to trust me when I say I am an expert, probably the world's most important one. I am really an excellent specialist. I started practising very young and I have seen stars in many occasions in the most curious situations. Let me add that in any case the result of my visions is so obvious that I can hardly hide it unless wearing a paper bag on my head.

It can happen anywhere, at any moment, sometimes even during night time, and uh, how can I put that in words, it is always unexpected. Yes the "suddenness" is what makes the thing interesting, really interesting.

I remember a special summer night, when I had one of my few star night visions. We had friends at home for the week end and a glamorous wedding the day after. I was delighted and had been looking forward to that particular event, as I was wearing a marvellous gown.

So far so good until my husband decided to wake up in the middle of the night without turning his bedside table light on, to get a glass of icy water from the fridge. So the room was completely dark, and I am particularly short sighted.

I stood up like a zombie, like I always do, walked like an automaton went to the bathroom, and I came back to bed. In the meantime, my husband had done the same thing, so we reached our sides of the bed at the same time. It was chronologically perfect. I was the first to lie down turning to the right just when he dropped himself turning to his left. And all of a sudden I had the most awesome, stunning, bright and colourful vision I ever had. I fell on my pillow hitting the back of my head against the iron headboard of our bed at the same moment the head of my husband was knocking my left eyebrow!

No words can describe the fireworks, the sparkling vision, the brightness of the colours and the deep intensity of our head collision: I even saw the little flying birds pictured in cartoons.

My husband is not human, he doesn't have bones like people do, nope, my husband is made of steel. I call him "Iron Man" since that night.

Let me say that the vision was so intense that I couldn't pronounce a single vowel, no sound at all. I was lost in my stars with my little birds, flying in circles and singing.

It was my husband who realised what had happened and was rather surprised with my silence, so he switched the light on saying: "Oh my God! What was that? Are you ok? Say something..." But I was unable to speak, so I reached for my glasses, ran to our bathroom, took a towel, wet it with cold water and stamped it on my left side of the face.

The result of the impressive collision was already showing; my left eye was starting to swell very quickly and I started yelling.

Obviously all that noisy mess had awake our friends who had dashed into our room trying to be of some help and to assist me.

My eye was getting redder and redder and my eyebrow was starting to make me look like a boxer. "Oh shit!" Tomorrow was going to be fabulous, I already could feel it! It was going to be a great day! But everybody was saying: "nah don't worry it is not THAT terrible, it will soon pass, just put that ointment on your eyebrow, it works miracles." ??? What else could be done? Nothing at all, so we all came back to sleep. Oh, what a night!!!

As I opened "my eye" next morning, the disaster was confirmed. I could feel it. I slowly walked to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror with terror. The ointment had probably worked miracles but NOT on MY FACE!!! I was the twin sister of Rocky: my nose bridge was so swollen that my glasses were floating on it. My left chameleon-like eye was now of a beautiful pink-violet colour and the wedding was at six p.m.!!!

Great!!! Well at least a black veil with a feather on a side to make it more chic, could wrap my face!

No need to say that nobody in the house could help laughing at my sight... and I spent the day, swearing, running after my husband with the serious intention to kill him: "Don't approach me! Don’t you ever, ever touch me again... NEVER! Stay away from me!!"

And the wedding was at six p.m... mid august, blazing hot and no black veil... my glasses floating on my nose, obviously no way to wear my contact lenses and looking like a female boxer... I wish I could vanish in the air.

But the show went on! Our friends got married. Everybody was having a great time. Catering was extraordinary, wines exquisite and lots of beautiful people everywhere... and Rocky was trying to hide behind her long hair, fighting the whole night long to cover the left side of her purple face...

MORAL of the story:

If you wanna get up in the middle of the night make sure to wake your husband and to order him: DON'T MOVE OR YOU'RE DEAD! ^_***